In Transition

5-14-12 worn out brain

 My energy is inconsistent these days…. Swinging high and low…. So I was thankful for a fairly relaxed weekend in KC with Greg. I savored the time just hanging out and even taking a few naps. We had lunch with Molly on Saturday and on Sunday afternoon Greg took me to see “The Jersey Boys”…. Which I enjoyed very much, since this was the story and music of the Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.

Driving back to Des Moines Sunday evening gave me the chance to reflect on some significant experiences I had last week.

Last week I had the chance to call myself “an artist” twice….I realized I was actually starting to own the word- and the label “Artist” …. And it felt good.

This had me remembering something from April 2007: 

I was working up at the Ames Hospital a few days a week with my co-worker Renee and she was telling me about a book her mother had read called “The Secret” … the details escape me now, but I remember she talked about asking the Universe for what you wanted and it will be so. Gee, I didn’t really have anything I felt like I wanted necessarily. I wasn’t dreaming very big those days.  I was just happy the way things were… no need to change anything. ….. Then I thought, perhaps I’d wish for a way that I could do my Art full time…. To become a “real artist”.

I don’t remember if Renee “wished” for something or not and I don’t remember IF I told my wish out loud or just kept it to myself. The weird thing was that a few weeks after that is when Greg got the offer go to KC to be an acting director for the summer, which then turned into a job full time in KC. HERE at that time, really was my chance to quit my job and follow him to KC and work on my art full time….. BUT I guess I wasn’t ready to take what the Universe had to offer me. Change can be a scary thing. Now, although it has taken me five years, I have begun to realize, accept and desire this radical transformation of myself into an artist. 

Another thing which had me thinking about this all was the Interview I got to do last week with a local TV news person, Mollie Cooney of Channel 8. Mollie does a series called “In the Artist Studio” taking to local artists from Des Moines. Lori, another co-worker and Peace Art Lover had suggested my name to Mollie…. I believe this was back early winter… and it took until spring for me to get the call. Timing is everything!.... I can see that clearly now. I wasn’t ready for an interview last winter, but I was last week….. just as I wasn’t ready to let go of my Des Moines life and Cancer work back in 2007, but I can feel the transition has started inside of me now.

The interview seemed to go well. I won’t know until it airs next Sunday morning. I’ll be able to get a link when this interview is posted on the TV8 website at some point. I really don’t remember much of what I said, but I do remember saying that when I was 6 years old in kindergarten being ask “what do you want to be when you grow up”….. I answered AN ARTIST…. So I believe by the time I am 60, I will fulfill my desire and become a full time artist.... LOOK OUT WORLD!!! Here I come!

So Renee, I don’t think I can wait until age 62 to retire…. I think I’ll be shooting for DEC 2013…. Or at least go part-time for awhile if I can….. The timing isn’t important…. It will all come together when it is suppose to… I just need to believe… and be brave enough to left go.

PS: I'll tell you about my second art experience from last week later this week.